If you're a newly-elected MP, how do you contain your joy? What do you say if you've just lost?
Phil Collins reviews fifty years of election night speeches - the moving, the inspirational, and the truly terrible.
He talks to the MPs and their unsuccessful rivals who have had to give them.
And as a former speechwriter himself, he offers some pointers for future candidates: who should you thank, who should you praise, and who - or what - should you just ignore? And how best to win or lose graciously?
Producer: Giles Edwards.